When I was 19 I changed my middle name to Alyssa, after my favorite female character of the time. She was a strong black woman, an FBI agent who didn’t take shit from anyone, and she got what she wanted because she wasn’t afraid to go after it. I changed my name to hers because she was an inspiration and I wanted to be just like her.
A few years ago, I got a tattoo that says, “Love is a kind of war, and no assignment for cowards,” because I promised myself to stop running away from relationships, and to work on mending the broken ones I had with my family.
See, I’m the kind of person who regularly reassesses myself and I like to brand myself with reminders of who I want to be. This blog name change is a similar thing. I thought up “Slow Reader” last year when it was my blog birthday, but then I thought it might be too soon for an overhaul since I’d only been blogging for a short period. Now, it’s time. With each week of 1000 new releases and blog social media accounts featuring constant recommendations by bloggers pitching books that rarely get read, as well as the herd mentality of most everyone reading the same books (harsh, but true), “Slow Reader” just started making more sense.
A couple of weeks ago, I woke up and decided that I wanted to reread a book after raving about it with a friend for about an hour the previous night. But, then I stopped myself because I had another book on my shelf that I wanted to read and review, a book that a lot of other bloggers were reading (I was so stoked when the publisher send me a copy!), and I wanted to have a review of it before the masses got to it. Well, I got irritated with myself for thinking that way. If I want to, I should should spend more time reading and fucking loving on the book I’m reading. Who cares about that other nonsense?
I’ve made similar resolutions before, but I still found myself falling prey to the beast that is blogging. Never as badly as some, but enough to make me annoyed with myself. This new name is my new tattoo. I’ve recently been trying to embrace the slow lifestyle , with all aspects of my life. This isn’t just about word count or reading less books in a challenge, it’s about deciding that if I’m going to do something, then I’m going to take the time to actually enjoy it. This new name is also a reminder to myself not to get too caught up in reading (sacrilege, I know!). It’s my signal saying, “Hey, Cristal, this blogging stuff is fun, but get off the internet! Put down that book for a bit — it won’t kill you — and go see the world. Fortunately, I have two gals now on the blog to contribute for those who like a more steady stream of reviews and book news. They’re both honest and have somewhat different tastes than me, so we’ll have a diverse batch of books to talk about.
Hopefully I’m not being too melodramatic about all this, but this is how I do change sometimes. For those of you who’ve been with me for a minute, and are already essentially Slow Readers, I hope you don’t mind the change. And, for those who may feel overwhelmed like myself, come on down and join the movement! (I’m officially dubbing this the Slow Reader movement, btw.) Okay, I’m off to work know. Talk to you later!